Holy Crap

Sep 18

I hate everyone and everything today

OK. Good talk.
Thanks.

I bet you didn’t know that I own a first edition Gameboy. I bought it in 1989 at FAO Schwarz. Fun fact: I worked for them for 2 years. It wasn’t as fun as you’d think. The business of toys is just as cut-throat as the fashion industry. 

Back in the olden days it was a family owned company that eventually ran out of capital. It was bought and sold by a number of investors until it was finally swallowed up by Toys R Us. 

Working for a family owned company has some advantages, but there are many drawbacks, specifically when it comes to HR issues. That said, I am very proud off my accomplishments there and a small part of my legacy remains in the 5th Avenue store today. 

Anyway, 25 years later the Tetrus theme music still plays in my head whenever I see a game screen.

I bet you didn’t know that I own a first edition Gameboy. I bought it in 1989 at FAO Schwarz. Fun fact: I worked for them for 2 years. It wasn’t as fun as you’d think. The business of toys is just as cut-throat as the fashion industry.

Back in the olden days it was a family owned company that eventually ran out of capital. It was bought and sold by a number of investors until it was finally swallowed up by Toys R Us.

Working for a family owned company has some advantages, but there are many drawbacks, specifically when it comes to HR issues. That said, I am very proud off my accomplishments there and a small part of my legacy remains in the 5th Avenue store today.

Anyway, 25 years later the Tetrus theme music still plays in my head whenever I see a game screen.

Sep 17

Drawing eyebrows on the train is probably the most dangerous game

Too late for the early train, too early for the lat train GPOYW 

Also, probably the last time you’ll see these glasses. And they’re crooked. 

Made you look!

Smirk

Too late for the early train, too early for the lat train GPOYW

Also, probably the last time you’ll see these glasses. And they’re crooked.

Made you look!

Smirk

Sep 16

Who asked you, ophthalmologist newsletter?

Who asked you, ophthalmologist newsletter?

So, let me get this straight… you finish your coffee and just leave the cup under your seat so that it spills and runs all over the floor?

Nice.

So, let me get this straight… you finish your coffee and just leave the cup under your seat so that it spills and runs all over the floor?

Nice.

The Match Game

I just played a championship round of plastic container Cinderella. It only took me 4 tries to find the right top for my cup of cole slaw.

Will I go to the store and buy a set of containers with matching lids that nest? No, because the upkeep commitment is too great.

I’ll just continue cursing into my kitchen cabinets at 6:45 AM

Sep 15

What if Mrs. Butterworth has self esteem issues?

You can call me by my new stripper name: Snotsie Von Snotzenberg

Maybe it’s Snotzy?

Seems “legit”

Seems “legit”

Sep 14

Does anyone want a gross dog who leaves her toys on pillows?

Does anyone want a gross dog who leaves her toys on pillows?

IT’S HONEYCRISP APPLE SEASON, MOTHERFUCKERS

AND SPAGHETTI SQUASH SEASON

(Source: ron-bailey)

This is what happens when the temperature dips below 65°. 

The good stuff will be donated to an organization that helps women dress for success with interview and professional clothing.

This is what happens when the temperature dips below 65°.

The good stuff will be donated to an organization that helps women dress for success with interview and professional clothing.

Stop touching my butt


[Please disregard giant boy sneakers and dog toy on floor]

Stop touching my butt


[Please disregard giant boy sneakers and dog toy on floor]

Sep 13

TRAVESTY

TRAVESTY